The Academy Awards

Lionsgate’s Contention Detention

So this weekend brings the biiiiig event that everyone in the film industry is always in a tizzy about: The Academy Awards. The Oscars. THE BIG CHEESE.

…Okay, nobody actually calls it that last one. But you get the picture!


Lionsgate has only two films in the race with 4 nominations total: Excellent drug thriller Sicario and familu fun animation Shaun and the Sheep. That’s all. And frankly, it’s from lack of trying. You see, these films were reportedly the only ones even brought forward for consideration.

Look, we’re realists. The Hunger Games: Mockingjay Part 2 was sure as hell not going to be nominated for Best Picture. WE KNOW THIS. Additionally, Lionsgate’s 2015 line-up was pretty lousy overall. It was absolutely not their year.

But are we saying that The Hunger Games franchise has NO technical value? The costumes! The make-up! Effects and set design! While we don’t know if the film would win, we’d say the technical aspects are nomination worthy. Or at least worthy of freaking consideration for a nomination! C’mon now!

Yes, the film industry didn’t take movies featuring teen main characters and geared toward younger audiences seriously, they really don’t take anything with a fandom seriously. But are they really ever going to if nobody even bothers advertising their eligibility for contention? Did Lionsgate just give up on the biggest and best franchise they’ve had since… possibly ever… at the final bell?

Really, it’s a shame. It feels like the studio is doubt the value of one its biggest successes in recent years, and from a fan’s perspective, that’s pretty heartbreaking.

Well, At Least Jennifer Lawrence Will Be There, Lookin’ Fly,


The Girl With The Pearl

Still Julianne– Also Alma Coin

Tomorrow is the Academy Awards, aka the Oscars and lo, nothing Hunger Games was nominated! That means one thing, right? Yup– we don’t have to watch! I’m imagining that crickets are sounding across the interwebz now. Sorry folks! I mean yes watch, tune in, make fake ballots, and themed mocktails, and cocktails to your hearts content, while you watch pretty people, and more pretty people traipse a red carpet in the Los Angeles sunshine, then read out loud from teleprompters like feeble, farsighted, novices! It’ll be a gas and

I think she's gonna win

I think she’s gonna win

a half!

There’s something very Capitol about the Oscars, no? Because when push comes to shove characters like Caesar Flickerman, and the style teams, are just morphed versions of the Fashion Police on the E! Network, or Ryan Seacrest, whom I think still hosts American Idol– but I’m not sure, ’cause I’ve never watched the show in my life. American Idol that is, I have watched the Oscars numerous times.

Tomorrow, however since The Hunger Games is yet again not recognized by the Academy for its feats in film making, we’re going to have to suffice with rooting for Julianne Moore for her work in the film Still Alice, as well as crossing our fingers, toes, and eyes that Josh walks across that stage without tripping, fumbling, or having his presenting partner be a foot taller than him!

Tune in at your own discretion everyone! I for one will sparingly do so, and the entire time I’ll be pretending that Boyhood is really about Peeta.

Them There Eyes

After The Oscars

It’s okay, people. It’s okay.

There’s a lot of us bumming out because Jennifer Lawrence didn’t win the Academy Award for Best Supporting Actress for her role in American Hustle. The award went to Lupita Nyong’o from 12 Years A Slave, who gave a really wonderful, stirring acceptance speech. Shortly after, Twitter broke. The world had THAT many Oscar feels just then.

Get it, gurl!

Get it, gurl!

While we’re a bit bummed, Lupita also gave a stunning performance and either way, it’s not the end of the world. In case you’re hopes are so squashed that you’re forgetting that, here’s why:

1) No one’s career is over.
Nothing is ever decided by an Oscar win. As much as everyone wants to win, it won’t ruin careers. Hell, there are some great movies and performances that don’t even get nominated. Despite not winning, she got herself a huge recognition. She’s got plenty of roles lined up. She’ll still get all sorts of movie offers after this. So why are people worried again?

2) Jennifer Lawrence is still Jenny from the… stables?
She grew up with horses, right? We’re not just making the up? ANYWAY, losing out this year won’t make her less perky or less lovable. It certainly won’t make any any less talented! And she’s still Katniss. Freaking. Everdeen. We just can’t see a thing like this sucking the life out of her. Girl knows a thing or two about real life priorities, from what we’ve seen.

3) Other movies.

East of Eden, anyone? How about rumors of another with David O. Russell (who comes off as somewhat creepily obsessed with her, but WHATEV)? Those will probably get some love from the awards world. And frankly, we don’t need all her films to be Oscar nominated. We will see them anyway.

4) We still got to see Jen looking fab on the red carpet.
Damn, that girl can rock a dress AND a hairstyle that’s questionable on most people!

So rock the good vibes, Jen! You’ve earned ’em, girl! Don’t mind any downers, we’re just busy living vicariously through movie stars.

Much Love,
The Girl With The Pearl


This is going to come as a shock to pretty much every single Hunger Games fan on the planet, but I do not want Jennifer Lawrence to win at the Oscars tomorrow night. Yeah, throw tomatoes, or bags of dog poo at me (I’d prefer tomatoes, thank you), but I think I have a good reason for not wanting her to win, or perhaps more than one reason.

Reason number one: I don’t want any more Jennifer Lawrence hate flooding the Internets at large. See, in our sick, twisted, stupid, and fucked up society, we tend to really, really, really, really like to kick people when they’re at a high point. Example: Remember when everyone loved Anne Hathaway, or at least liked her acting, and mostly tolerated her perkiness, and her eager to

Yeah... I think we'll keep her.

Yeah… I think we’ll keep her.

please attitude? Yeah, well– have you seen much of Anne Hathaway lately? I’ll answer that question for you. NOPE! She’s been working, true– but she’s had one of the lowest public profiles since her breakthrough role in 2001. And do you know why she’s been so low-key lately? Welp, because the media, and the Internets started becoming an all out hate mongering death trap for her. Jen’s different though, talent wise she’s on par with Hathaway, because come on– even if you don’t like Hathaway you cannot deny that the woman is talented at her craft. However, where Jen and her differ greatly is their all out public persona. Jen’s kind of no-nonsense, quirky, and unapologetic for her inability to conform. Hathaway, um– yeah, she’s kind of a bit of a conformist, a bit faux, and kinda sorta a priss. Seriously, I don’t think we’ll ever see Hathaway making the faces that Jen does, which is okay– Jen’s doin’ her thang, and I will never not enjoy her weird. But Anne, even after all the praise, and the awards, and the hard work she put in, she got a hate storm of epic proportions thrown at her after she won, and was nominated for everything under the sun, and she got that storm thrown at her because she was doing well, and people got tired of her doing well. I do not want that to happen to Jen, therefore even though I do think that her performance in American Hustle was commendable, in full disclosure mode– I

Sunday, be there or be square

Sunday, be there or be square

don’t think it’s her year.

Which brings me to my second reason: Lupita Nyong’o– her performance in 12 Years a Slave is earth shatteringly good, actually everyone’s performance in 12 Years a Slave is more than good, all the way down to Garret Dillahunt, and one of my personal favorite character actors, Paul Dano. You know how there are films that just deserve to be recognized because they go places that have never been gone to before? For example Philadelphia, or Midnight Cowboy, 12 Years a Slave is like those films and the performances are above board, and without qualms, or mercy, or affectedness– American Hustle, and Jennifer Lawrence– I can’t with a clear conscience say that either has those same facets in my opinion.

May the best woman win!

Them There Eyes

Prepping Jennifer Lawrence For The Academy

Every now and again, we like to pretend we’re super fashionable. It’s not a real thing (at least for this gal), but it’s good to pretend. And with Jennifer Lawrence hitting the Academy Awards red carpet this weekend, that part of our brain thinks “What is she going to wear?!”

In case you missed it, Jen will be wearing Dior on the red carpet this year. Probably next year too. Why? Because Dior is paying her roughly a gajillion dollars to be their representative and wear only their stuff. To which we say “GET IT, GURL.” Though it’s a shame they decided to make her look like a 12-year-old boy in the most recent round of ads, because the typical Photoshop abuse wasn’t bad enough.

ANYWAY… The Dior connection helps us narrow down her potential look!

Unfortunately, we weren’t exactly thrilled with what Dior has shown the world this year. The Spring Couture collection involved puffy fits and eyelets, making the collection look like a mesh basket had a baby with a shower curtain. Though not all of it is awful, it’s not our favorite. Observe one of the better pieces from the bunch:


Different? Sure!         Red carpet? Uhhhh… no thanks.

There’s also the “ready to wear” Spring/Summer collection, which is too informal for The Academy, but there’s room for inspiration in there. In this line, there’s lots of bunchy fabrics, funky designs, and cutouts. To the not so fashionable or au couture inclined (aka ME!), these styles are a little more bearable. Yet they’re borderline tacky and seem more likely to be worn by a prom date than an actress up for a prestigious honor:


Thankfully, we’re likely to see Jen in a CUSTOM number. Dior wouldn’t do that for every event (as evidenced by Jen wearing several designs that have been seen on the runway in the past), but we’re talking about the freaking Oscars. It could be a completely different look from these two most recent collections, but we’re imagining an intermingling.

Jen’s been very muted and plain– style-wise!— this awards season, so it would be nice to see her in some color. Something that makes her look like she’s in her 20s and not her 60s, because stuff that ages up young stars too much will forever drive us crazy. Jennifer Lawrence is not plain and shouldn’t dress that way, either!

We can’t all have a stellar fashion streak like Lupita Nyong’o did this year, but Jen’s looked fabulous and has the potential to wear something kickass. Just go for form fitting. And avoid the cheesecloth look. And be perfect. IS THAT SO HARD, DIOR?!

Living Vicariously Through Total Strangers Since FOREVER,
The Girl With The Pearl

The Catching Fire Oscar Snub

We always have high apple pie in the sky hopes for The Hunger Games franchise, but we know that Catching Fire wasn’t going to get a shot at anything but technical awards, thanks to that “We don’t recognize anything that’s popular with the peasants” Academy attitude we’ve discussed before.

So you can imagine our reaction as we read down that list of nominees…

*scanning the acting categories*



Admission: We haven’t actual seen American Hustle yet. We’ve heard from others that Jen was fantastic, though the movie on the whole was a bit overrated. So YAY J-LAW!

We knew it would be the coldest day in hell when the Academy considered any actor for their role in a fantasy blockbuster aimed at young adults, even ones they love like Jen, Philip Seymour Hoffman, and Stanley Tucci. Thus we’ll take little victories like actors we love getting nominated for other things.

And then…
*scanning the technical categories*

Bad Grandpa? The Lone RangerTWICE?! We don’t know what Disney is putting in that Academy kool-aid but DAMN, it must be powerful! But wait… No Catching Fire?!


What the actual fuck?

Let’s talk costumes. Many media outlets have repeatedly discussed the possibility of Catching Fire winning the Academy Award in this category as if the nomination itself was a no-brainer. And they’re right! Trish Summerville created a showcase of brilliantly crafted designs that not only looked spectacular on film, but told the story of each individual character. The intricate detail is honestly some of the most impressive costume design we’ve ever seen. Instead, pretty but same-y era movies got the recognition instead.

How about makeup and hairstyling? Are they really giving a nomination to The Lone Ranger for throwing sloppy face paint on Johnny Depp and Jackass for making Johnny Knoxville look geriatric? Yet the outrageous Capitol hair and makeup is totally overlooked! Then again, these are the same people who said the makeup that made Meryl Streep look like Margaret Thatcher was more award-worthy than the hundreds of intricate, unique designs found in the seventh Harry Potter film.

A small part of me wonders if Capitol Couture marketing hype, including the push into clothing and makeup sales (even going back to the nail polish line for the first film) , put a bad taste in the mouths of prominent Hollywood voters. Or maybe they don’t like that the style kinda mocks them. Who knows?

Don’t even get us started on visual effects! We’re glad Peter Jackson’s WETA got nominated for Desolation of Smaug, their work alongside the rest of the FX team on Catching Fire should also get recognition over most of the films actually nominated, which probably featured MORE special effects, but not necessarily effects of the same quality.

Alas, we should just accept that we’re talking about a bunch of old white guys making picks based off studio politics and this year, there was even less variety than usual. They stuck to their faves and they stuck to them HARD. Too bad it makes them look like total asses.

OH OH OH OH OH and MUSIC! Coldplay practically tailored ‘Altas’ specifically for the Academy. Plus, they tend to get attention of awards circuits in general. Now NOTHING? Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?

Go Home, Academy. You’re Drunk.
The Girl With The Pearl



Jennifer Lawrence Oscars Academy Awards 2013 red carpet

And looked FABULOUS doing it!

*cough* We mean, not that we’re that surprised. We explained our high hopes after seeing Silver Linings Playbook and her steady string of wins beforehand, but nothing is guaranteed until it happens and IT DID. If ever you stumble across this in an alternate universe where you find yourself on Hunger Games humor blogs: CONGRATULATIONS, JENNIFER!

Also, before the fandom snobs come out to say “So what? She didn’t win for The Hunger Games. Why is the fandom making a big deal out of it?” Just leave the party (aka this blog) NOW. You are uninvited, because you clearly don’t get it, man! Jennifer is the core of the films and we support her in all her endeavors because she’s whip smart, grounded, and doing all she can to make great films… We even forgive her for House at the End of the Street!

But before the Oscar was even won, fans were all a-Twitter about what could happen if she did…


Yes, the curse in which talented actors win an Academy Award and then go on to take a professional cliff dive into ridiculously bad film choices that make audiences wince, with the occasional decent but not-very-worthwhile role thrown in there. Halle Berry, Marisa Tomei, Adrien Brody, and Cuba Gooding Jr. are popular examples of the phenomenon at work. Will Jennifer Lawrence be next?

Jennifer Lawrence Oscars Academy Awards 2013 trip fall


To help riddle this out, we’ve created a list of what could happen to Jen’s career:
1. Catching Fire, Mockingjay: Part 1, and Mockingjay: Part 2 could all bomb critically despite intense popularity, thus truly making it the next Twilight.
2. Beloved Hollywood directing icon in the making, David O. Russell, could turn Jennifer’s other upcoming films, The Ends of the Earth and an untitled Abscam film, into utter disasters.
3. After receiving almost every script she qualifies for a role in, she picks all the most tired, oldest concepts and roles that she can easily phone in.
4. She quits acting to pursue a career in crab fishing or cattle ranching, never to be seen in Hollywood again.
5. She makes her upcoming films. They are released and most likely get good receptions from both audiences and critics. She makes more movies, some of which probably miss the mark, but she tries to make smart film choices and acts the hell out of them either way. She gets plenty more opportunity for recognition over the next several years.

We might be straight up craaaaaaazy, but we’re gonna go with #5!

For every “Oscar curse” recipient, there are others who have won in multiple occasions or even been well-received throughout their careers without a slew of extra nominations. Daniel Day-Lewis won his third Lead Actor award tonight and it’s not coincidence– the man has talent and he took on challenging, risky roles that paid off over the course of a long career. He’s astounding but he’s not superhuman, so why should we expect other winners like Jennifer to fail?

We Trip Every Day! Talk About Us Instead, Media!
The Girl With The Pearl


Vanity Fair HollywoodThe other day, I read an article where Jessica Chastain denied on her Facebook page that there was a feud between her and our dear Jennifer Lawrence. To which, I went, Hold up, people actually think they’re feuding?! And it’s a big enough problem where Ms. Chastain actually had to address it?

In fact, this was courtesy of the ever reliable source, ShowBiz Spy. Gross.

Sure, they’re in about every best actress race there is during this prestige season, and they’re always mentioned as the two frontrunners to boot. But so are several nominees in other categories. That actually tends to be the case, the same people, plus or minus an Affleck, tend to get nominated in the same categories for each award. It doesn’t mean everyone is feuding.

In fact, during awards season, the nominees tend to hang out with each other a lot during press events and what not and they always seem to have great camaraderie among them. Didn’t Jennifer say Sally Field joked they should carpool? And one of my favorite best actress moments ever – and let’s face it top 5 for awards show moments just in general at least – was during the 2011 Emmys in the comedy category when the lovely female nominees stood together on stage in support and genuine fondness of each other.

But no, two highly lauded, successful actresses MUST be feuding. If the media were to be believed, every actress must hate Jennifer, from Kristen Stewart to Angelina Jolie and now Jessica Chastain. Each story just seems more ludicrous than the next.

From Jessica’s statement:

“Please don’t allow the media to perpetuate the myth that women aren’t supportive of each other. Every time an actress is celebrated for her great work, I cheer. For the more brilliant their performance, the more the audience demands stories about women. With support and encouragement, we help to inspire this industry to create opportunities for women. And as we all know: a great year for women in film, is just a great year for film.”

So can we please put this one to rest?

The only ‘catfight’ Jennifer should be involved in is with Buttercup

Buttercup Hiss


Jennifer Lawrence: Winner of Almost Everything

new-the-silver-linings-playbook-poster-france-jennifer-lawrence-32529345-1416-1925__iphone_320Jennifer Lawrence is a winner, literally. Two days in a row she’s won in several of the categories she was nominated in at two different award shows (People’s Choice, and Critics’ Choice), and things are only looking like the trend is going to continue for her. This weekend is the Golden Globe Awards, and our dear Jen is nominated for Best Actress in a Comedy or Musical for Silver Linings Playbook– and the nomination is wholly deserved, as is the plethora of awards she’s collecting, and will probably end up displaying in her bathroom. Like I said above, the trend is continuing, ’cause this morning she was nominated for her second Oscar. Just think on that for a second, she’s 22 years-old, and she already has two Academy Award nominations under her belt, not even Meryl Streep can boast two Academy Award nominations by the time she was 22, and she’s considered one of the best actresses in history. Although, Meryl was attending Yale graduate school when she was 22– oops.

Awards are nice, nominations are nice too, but you know what’s the best part, at least for us selfish Hunger Games fans? The fact that the star of our favorite book to film adaptation is critically acclaimed, and a prestigious awards nominee twice over, which puts the franchise on a completely different level from others that are grouped into the same YA category. Yeah, safe to say we’re more than proud of our leading lady, and equally proud of the talented and award-winning/ nominated supporting cast members. This morning wasn’t just good for Jen either, nope– Philip Seymour Hoffman was nominated for Best Supporting Actor in a drama for The Master. I realize that The Master isn’t exactly the kind of film that a so-called typical Hunger Games fan would have ventured out to see, but I did– and yes, the Academy got it right, they also got it right when they nominated Joaquin Phoenix for the same film, but for Best Actor. I kid you not, watching Joaquin was like watching Christian Bale in The Fighter, a succession of mentally saying “is that really Christian Bale!?” But in this case it was “is that really Joaquin!?” The Master is a great film, please go see it. I’m all for great films, and Hoffman’s in it!

Silver Linings Playbook and The Master seem to be almost rivals where it comes to nominations in acting, because The Master is only missing a nomination for Best Actress, whereas Silver Linings Playbook can boast acting nominations in all categories, which is historical to put it lightly. Through all this hoopla, and craziness though, Jennifer only seems to be becoming more and more comfortable with her self– which is why we like her so much.

And, maybe also for the fact that she can motorboat and/or headbutt her co-star, and friend, in the chest after winning a People’s Choice Award, and we don’t judge her for it– in fact we embrace her for it, and kind of like her more. I need to stop saying more.

99571841733282584_4FeF7gCc_cThem There Eyes